JAG: Old Stories Compilation
by NettieC
Summary: A million years ago (well, maybe 8) when I started writing JAG fanfic, I posted them on a now defunct site and promptly forgot about them. Now, I am cleaning up my computer, as it's nearly full, and going through lots of files and have found ones that were posted elsewhere but not here - check AN note on first chapter: "When Will I See You Again".
1. Chapter 1

When Will I See You Again

By Nettie

A/N: Not having seen the final ep, this is my version of the ending. As always I will adapt things to fit my story, so apologies in advance.

**JAG Headquarters Conference Room**

**Tuesday 1:45 pm**

'Wow,' muttered Bud as General Cresswell exited the conference room after dropping his bombshell.

'Wow, indeed,' echoed Sturgis thoughts racing through his mind. They both looked across at Harm and Mac who hadn't moved from their seats and hadn't said a word.

'Well, congratulations Harm or should I say Captain Rabb,' offered Sturgis throwing him a mock salute.

'Ah, oh, yeah, thanks,' Harm replied standing to shake Sturgis' outstretched hand. 'Have to say it was unexpected myself.'

'Now why would you say that, Harm, I mean your record is…well…' Sturgis laughed. Harm was an excellent lawyer and officer but his methods had been known to ruffle more than a few feathers over time.

'I guess I got the promotion to take up the posting,' he said looking at Mac who still hadn't spoken.

'The London post is a huge honour, Harm, you should be very proud,' Bud said trying to be positive about the changes ahead.

'Oh, I am proud it's just things are going to be very different, everything's going to change.'

Silence descended on the group. The General had just informed them that their home at JAG Headquarters in Falls Church would be no more. JAG would be relocating to more appropriate locations and the staff would be reassigned accordingly. Harm's promotion and posting to London was the first of many for the group who had become family over their time together.

'Mac, are you happy about going to San Diego?' Sturgis finally asked.

'Yeah, I guess. Just like any other post, right? I mean, we all knew that this one wouldn't last forever.' She looked from one to the other. Duty stations had always been a temporary thing, she had served around the world but this one was different. It was where she truly felt at home, a home that, up until she had arrived nine years earlier, she had never experienced.

'The weather will be warmer,' offered Bud as a consolation. For his part he got to stay in Washington DC and Sturgis had several options but nothing confirmed.

'That's something I guess,' Mac said before standing and walking out, leaving her notes on the table.

'Mac doesn't seem to have taken the news too well,' remarked Sturgis as the door closed behind her.

'No, she doesn't,' commented Bud. 'I guess we're all a bit shocked. I had no idea that this was on the agenda. There's been no scuttlebutt. It's come in right under the radar.'

Silence again descended as the men stood lost in their own thoughts. They had a week left together, by next Monday everything would be different.

**Bud's Office**

**4.27 pm**

Bud was hanging up the phone when Harm knocked on his door.

'Come on in,' he said without much enthusiasm.

'Harriet?' asked Harm.

'Yeah,' sighed Bud.

'How did she take the news?'

Bud shook his head.

'That well?'

'I couldn't understand most of what she said because of the sobbing?'

'Your's or hers?' Harm asked half jokingly.

'Both! I can't believe that Mac, you and Harriet and I are going to be so far apart. We are going to miss you both and so are the kids, especially AJ, he loves you both so much.'

'And we love him. It will be strange at first but we'll keep in touch, there are phone calls, emails, photos, visits.'

'It's never the same though, is it Harm?'

'No I guess not.'

'Anyway, was there something you needed?'

'Huh?'

'You came in here, were you looking for something?'

'A friendly face, while I can get one. I went to talk to Mac but …'

'She's not a friendly face?'

'Not today, Bud, not today.'

'What are you going to do?'

'About what?'

'About what! What do you think?' Bud nodded towards Mac's office.

'I don't know. Maybe give her some time to …'

'You don't have time, do you?'

Harm shook his head. He loved Mac he always had and always would. He truly believed that for all their difficulties that they would end up together. He had dreamt about it and fantasized about it. He had even prayed for it but there was always someone or something in their way. This time it was going to be nearly 6000 miles.

**MAC'S OFFICE**

**4.35 pm**

'Enter,' she said looking up from her desk. Sturgis walked in and sat down.

'How you doing, Mac?' he asked sympathetically.

'Me, I'm fine. Why do you ask?'

'Well, the General's bombshell seemed to knock you about a bit. I just wanted to check that you were okay.'

'Thanks, but I'm fine. It wasn't what I was planning on but I'll adapt.'

'What were you planning on?'

Mac sighed, shrugged her shoulders and gave a wistful smile.

'Mac?'

'Oh, nothing really, just the happily ever after every girl dreams of.'

'Oh, that little thing. Are you going to get it?'

'From San Diego, I doubt it.'

'Are you going to do something about it?'

'There's not the time.'

'Not the time?' Sturgis echoed. 'You've had nine years.'

Mac stood and turned to the window. She had had all the time she needed and she had had the opportunities but had blown them. She had dreamt of the happily ever after scenario and fantasized about it. She had even prayed for it but there was always someone or something in the way. This time it would be 6000 miles.

'Are you still in love with him?' Sturgis asked breaking into her thoughts.

'Yep.'

'Then you can still have your happily ever after if you're prepared to take the chance.'

Sturgis departed and Mac was left to ponder his words. A future with Harm was what she wanted but to be together one of them would have to give up their commission.

**FRIDAY 7.30 pm**

**ROBERTS' RESIDENCE**

As imminent and pressing as the break up of JAG was, the desire of the staff to spend their last days together was pre-empted by other matters that needed priority. There were cases to finalise, offices to pack, files to be archived, travel arrangements to be made, apartments to pack up, leases to organise and so it was that the week past in a blur with little time left for sentiment or reminiscing.

The official JAG farewell had been scheduled for Saturday night at McMurphy's, an informal get together to say goodbye and bon voyage and to celebrate the highs and lows of an incredible decade. But Harriet wanted more, she didn't want to say goodbye to her dearest friends surrounded by colleagues. She wanted this to be about her family and she knew that although it would be incredibly hard to have them leave her life it was going to be harder for Harm and Mac to say goodbye to each other. This was going to be her last endeavour at playing matchmaker. She had told Bud her plan and for the first time he hadn't objected.

Mac had arrived first and went into the kitchen to help Harriet. Their conversation was bright and breezy and both tried not to dwell on the 'it's the last time we'll…' scenarios that crossed their minds.

'Bud and I are sure going to miss you and Harm,' Harriet finally ventured.

'I'm going to miss you two, too,' said Mac giving her friend a quick hug.

'And Harm? Are you going to miss him?'

'Of course I am. I mean we've worked together for a decade now. We've become such a part of each others lives. It won't be easy breaking in a new partner, but I'll manage.'

Harriet nodded, Mac's words had come confidently but her eyes revealed her true sadness at leaving the love of her life.

They were seated in the lounge when Harm arrived, late as usual, Harriet asked him to help her out with the drinks and so he followed her into the kitchen.

'Are you all packed and ready, Harm?'

'As ready as I'll ever be I guess.'

'Bud and I will really miss you and Mac,' Harriet ventured.

'And I'll miss you guys too,' said Harm giving her a quick hug.

'And what about Mac?'

'I'll miss her too. It won't be easy working in a new office without having her around to tell me how I should be doing things.' He smiled trying to make light of the situation, but his eyes revealed his true sadness at leaving the love of his life.

'This might be easier than I thought,' Harriet muttered to herself as they moved back to the lounge.

**SATURDAY 12.15 am**

Harm looked at his watch, it was already Saturday. He couldn't believe how quickly the evening had flown. It was all so friendly and comfortable he could physically feel his heart becoming heavier with the knowledge that later on that night he would say goodbye to them. His flight to Heathrow was scheduled for 0955 Sunday and then it would just be him and the English.

'You got somewhere to go, Flyboy?' asked Mac as he checked his watch again.

'No, why do you ask?'

'You've checked your watch three times in the last five minutes.'

'Sorry. I just couldn't believe the time – where does it all go?'

'It is late,' said Bud.

'It's not _too _late,' added Harriet. She didn't want the evening to end, she wasn't ready to say goodbye, not just yet. 'I know, let's dance.'

'Dance?' asked Bud. 'Now?'

'Why not?' asked Harriet in a tone Bud had learnt not to question.

'Why not indeed,' he said smiling at his wife.

Bud and Harm moved the coffee table to make more room and Harriet started the CD.

As the music started playing Bud held his hand out for his wife and spun her around. Harm held his hand out for Mac, she stood and moved into his arms, a place she wanted to be forever.

Phil Collins and Mariah Carey's voices sang out quietly

_How can I just let you walk away,  
just let you leave without a trace  
When I stand here taking every breath with you, ooh  
You're the only one who really knew me at all_

How can you just walk away from me,  
when all I can do is watch you leave  
'cause we've shared the laughter and the pain  
and even shared the tears  
You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now,  
oh there's just an empty space  
And there's nothing left here to remind me,  
just the memory of your face  
Ooh take a look at me now,  
well there's just an empty space  
And you coming back to me is against all odds  
and that's what I've got to face

I wish I could just make you turn around,  
turn around and see me cry  
There's so much I need to say to you,  
so many reasons why  
You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now,  
well there's just an empty space  
And there's nothing left here to remind me,  
just the memory of your face  
Now take a look at me now,  
'cause there's just an empty space  
But to wait for you, is all I can do  
and that's what I've got to face

Take a good look at me now,  
cos I'll still be standing here  
And you coming back to me is against all odds  
It's the chance I've gotta take  
Take a look at me now.

When the song ended Mac went to sit down, one sad song was enough – her chance of a meaningful relationship with Harm was against all odds and it broke her heart.

'Not so quickly,' said Bud, grabbing her hand before she made it to the sofa.

'Sarah MacKenzie, may I please have this dance?'

Mac looked at him, how could she say no.

Michael Bolton's voice came crystal clear from the speakers and Mac knew she would have a fight on her hands to stop herself from crying.

_I could hardly believe it  
When I heard the news today  
I had to come and get it straight from you  
They said you were leavin'  
Someone swept your heart away  
From the look upon your face I see it's true  
So tell me all about it, tell me 'bout the plans you're makin'  
Then tell me one thing more before I go_

Chorus  
Tell me how am I supposed to live without you  
Now that I've been lovin' you so long  
How am I supposed to live without you  
How am I supposed to carry on  
When all that I've been livin' for is gone

I didn't come here for cryin'  
Didn't come here to breakdown  
It's just a dream of mine is coming to an end  
And how can I blame you  
When I built my world around  
The hope that someday we'd be so much more than friends  
And I don't wanna know the price I'm gonna pay for dreaming  
When even now it's more than I can take

Tell me how am I supposed to live without you  
Now that I've been lovin' you so long  
How am I supposed to live without you  
How am I supposed to carry on  
When all that I've been livin' for is gone

As the final chorus played, Bud whispered something to her neither Harm nor Harriet could hear. It made her smile and she kissed his cheek.

'Harriet, what CD is this?' asked Harm.

'A special one,' she replied, choosing not to tell him that she had spent hours that afternoon trying to find the perfect songs for the evening. She had painstakingly searched through her collection and had created a CD each for them for their trip home – hoping it would assist her matchmaking venture.

'I hate to be the one to do this but I still have lots to do tomorrow and if I don't leave now I'm not going to get it done,' Mac said sadly, still holding onto Bud.

'I guess we knew it would have to end sometime,' said Harriet, tears filling her eyes.

'Oh, Harriet, don't cry,' said Mac rushing to hug her. 'It's not like we won't see each other again. If fact we'll be seeing each other later on tonight.'

'Yeah, but it will never be the same. You two are our best friends. Our lives have changed incredibly in the time we have known you and you have both been a part of that. The highs were so much better because we shared them with you and the lows were easier to bear because you were there.' Tears streamed down Harriet's face, all thoughts of trying to compose herself were gone.

'Oh Harriet,' was all Mac could muster through her own tears and sense of loss. Harriet was her only true female friend; she didn't know how she'd manage being alone in the world again.

Bud moved towards the two and embraced them both, he had tried several times to find the right words to say goodbye to the two people who had influenced both his personal and professional live so much but he just couldn't. His wife had summed it up beautifully.

Harriet looked out at Harm who was standing watching his friends. She held out her hand and sadly said, 'Group hug.' Harm joined them, his tears mingling with theirs.

When the circle finally broke there was nothing left to say. As Harm and Mac walked to the door, Harriet handed them each a CD.

'Just a little something from us,' she said as she kissed Harm and then Mac.

'Drive safely,' said Bud putting his arms around his wife.

Bud and Harriet stood quietly on the porch watching their friends drive off in two different directions. She knew that if things went the way she hoped Harm and Mac would meet up again soon.

Mac listened to the CD on the way home, driving through a mist of tears. Every one of Harriet's handpicked songs brought up so many memories of the good times they had shared together, of the bad times, of the love she felt for Harm.

Harm had listened to the CD too but when he thought he needed his windshield wipers for rain and realised it was his own tears he turned it off. He knew it was going to break his heart saying goodbye to Mac he didn't need to experience it in song first.

Mac was four blocks from home when she was forced to pull over. It was a song she had heard so many times before, but this time it was different. It wasn't just background noise or elevator music it was the questioning of her heart.

_When will I see you again?  
When will we share precious moments?  
Will I have to wait forever?  
Or will I have to suffer and cry the whole night through?_

When will I see you again?  
When will our hearts beat together?  
Are we in love or just friends?  
Is this my beginning or is this the end?  
When will I see you again?  
(When will I see you again?)  
When will I see you again?

Are we in love or just friends?  
Is this my beginning or is this the end?  
When will I see you again?  
(When will I see you again?)  
When will I see you again?  
(When will I see you again?)  
When will I see you again?  
(When will I see you again?)  
When will I see you again?

Mac took a deep breath and pulled her car back out onto the road, seeing there was no traffic she made a u-turn and headed to the only place she ever really wanted to be.

**HARM'S APARTMENT**

**2.34 am**

Mac knocked on his door and waited and waited. When there was no answer she let herself in with her key, realising she'd have to leave it with him.

'Harm?' she called as she entered. She gasped when she saw the room empty except for a few boxes alongside the wall. Her apartment looked the same but it had just hit her that it was over. After tomorrow this would no longer be Harm's apartment, her refuge from whatever haunted her. She could no longer call past to see him when she needed to. She would be in San Diego and he would be in London and that very thought frightened her.

Mac stood there in tears. She had tried to convince herself that they could maintain their friendship long distance, now she wasn't so sure. Harm was the only constant in what had been a difficult life, even when they weren't getting along she derived comfort from just knowing he was close by. She always knew he would be there to pick up the pieces if things fell apart, she trusted him, she loved him. She had no idea how she was going to be able to live without him.

'Mac?' Harm startled her coming out from the bedroom.

'I'm sorry,' she apologised. 'I knocked but…'

'It's okay. What's wrong?' he asked wiping away her tears.

'I can't do this,' she said, moving to the door.

'Do what?' he asked grabbing her and holding her to him.

'This. I can't say goodbye to you. I can't …I can't …'

He held her tight and kissed her head. He couldn't either.

Awhile later Mac broke away and gazed into his crystal blue eyes; they had been the first thing she had noticed about him.

'Come and sit down,' he said ushering her to the stool at the breakfast counter.

She sighed deeply. 'Damn Harriet.'

'Why?'

'Did you listen to her CD?'

'Only part of it. It, um, got a bit much.'

'Coward,' Mac smiled at him. 'I got four blocks away from my place when I had to pull over.'

'What song did it?

Mac began to sing softly,

_When will I see you again?  
When will we share precious moments?  
Will I have to wait forever?  
Or will I have to suffer and cry the whole night through?_

When will I see you again?  
When will our hearts beat together?  
Are we in love or just friends?  
Is this my beginning or is this the end?  
When will I see you again?  
(When will I see you again?)  
When will I see you again?

'Oh, that one?'

Mac nodded.

'Lots of questions there,' Harm offered.

'Yes there is.'

'I guess you answered the first one.'

'Did I?'

'Yeah, by coming over here.'

Mac half smiled. 'I think I know the answer to the fourth one. I've done a lot of crying tonight.'

Harm kissed her forehead. 'They're the easy two, what about the rest?' He asked not knowing whether to feel dread or anticipation.

Silence ensued.

'Mac, I will never love anybody the way I love you,' Harm finally said.

'You'd better not say that to your wife,' Mac replied trying to give him an out.

'Let me make myself clear, Sarah MacKenzie. I am in love with you. I always have been and I always will. I guess the question now is, is this the beginning or is this the end?'

'I don't know the answer to that but I do know that I am in love with you, Harmon Rabb Junior, and I can't bear the thought of being so far away from you.'

She pulled him close to her and kissed him tenderly and he responded willingly.

Finally he broke away.

'I don't want you living 6000 miles away from me,' he whispered.

'Where do you want me living?'

'With me. Mac, let's get married.'

No words were needed; Mac let her actions do all the talking.

**SATURDAY 6.45 pm**

**McMURPHY'S **

'Let's mark this one down in the record books,' Sturgis laughed as Harm approached their table.

'Well, I guess it had to happen once,' chided Bud.

'What?' asked Harm defensively.

'Ignore them, Harm, they are just stirring,' said Harriet patting Harm's hand.

'That's right, Harm. You do realise that tonight's festivities are due to kick off until 1900,' said Sturgis.

'Well, you guys are already here.'

'Yeah but we are usually early or punctual – you on the other hand…'

'Am known for my tardiness, right?'

'Right.'

They all laughed.

'So are you all ready to go, Harm?' asked Sturgis as Harm sat beside him.

'Yeah, I think so.'

'Anything else you need to do?' asked Harriet, hopefully.

'No, I think I did everything I needed to do today.'

'Oh,' said Harriet.

'Wow,' said Sturgis as he spied Mac entering the room wearing a floor length red gown. All heads turned to watch her. The biggest smile imaginable spread across Harm's face and it was duly noted by Harriet. As Mac moved toward them Harm stood and to the delight of all present kissed her. It wasn't a friendly greeting kiss but a clear expression of their newly declared love.

'Oh my God!' exclaimed Harriet at the sight. 'Does this mean…'

Harm and Mac broke apart smiling at each other.

'Well,' prompted Bud.

Harm cleared his throat. 'Mac and I have an announcement...' he began.

'Announcement?' interrupted the General joining the group.

'Uh, yes sir,' said Mac.

'Am I going to like this announcement?' he asked.

'Probably not,' replied Harm.

'Well, get on with it,' said the General.

'As I was saying, Mac and I have an announcement…'

'Hello everyone,' interrupted Jennifer pulling up a chair. 'Did I miss anything?'

'Harm and Mac are just about to make an _announcement_,' said Harriet daring anyone else to interrupt. 'Go ahead.'

'Well, it will come as no surprise to any of you that Mac and I are in love. It has just taken us a long while to actually admit it…'

'That's your announcement? You're in love. Tell us something we don't know,' chided Sturgis.

'We're engaged,' Mac smiled.

'Yes,' shouted Harriet jumping up from the table to embrace her friends. 'This is fantastic, I am so very happy.' She kissed them both. Congratulatory kisses and hugs were exchanged before Bud asked the pressing question.

'So who's resigning?'

Harm and Mac looked at each other. They had started to discuss that very issue before the overwhelming urge to consummate their relationship took over.

'We haven't quite decided that,' said Harm.

'Well, I think it is important that you do, Commander. You are leaving for London tomorrow and the Colonel is due in San Diego Tuesday.'

'How are you going to decide?' asked Jen.

Neither Harm nor Mac replied.

'Toss a coin,' suggested Bud pulling out the coin the Admiral had given him on his own retirement.

'What do you think?' Harm asked Mac.

'Let's do it.'

'Your call,' said Harm.

'Heads and we go to San Diego,' said Mac.

'Deal,' said Harm.

Bud flicked the coin into the air. The group watched entranced as light reflected off the coin giving it a sparkling glow. Mac held her breath, as the coin spun she began hoping it would land on tails. If she and Harm were to have any chance of having their own family it should be her that resigned her commission. She caught the coin midair. 'London it is,' she said kissing him. 'This is the beginning.'


	2. Glory of Love

AN: Now, this is the AN that was supposed to be on the first chapter, I just forgot to hit save. Anyway, I'll post the old stories as I come across them. Some aresongfics or inspired by songs (like this one). Some have the original Australian punctuation (before I knew American's punctuated speech differently and made the change - after some reader protests). Some have errors of some sort but I am not making any revisions on them. They are what they are - my earliest stories and I am posting them all here as chapters of the one story so a) I can have all my works in one place and b) so hopefully a few people will enjoy them.

Glory of Love

inspired by  
Glory of Love - Peter Cetera

Tonight it's very clear  
And we're both standing here  
There's so many things I want to say  
I will always love you  
I will never leave you alone  
Sometimes I just forget  
Say things I might regret  
It breaks my heart to see you crying  
I don't want to lose you  
I could never make it alone

Chorus  
I am a man who would fight for your honor  
I'll be the hero you're dreaming of  
We'll live forever knowing together  
That we did it all for the glory of love

You keep me standing tall  
You help me through it all  
I'm always strong when you're beside me  
I have always needed you  
I could never make it alone

Just like a knight in shining armor  
From a long time ago  
Just in time I will save the day  
Take you to my castle far away

Glory of Love

The night was cool and still as Mac sat upon the steps of the Lincoln Memorial. This was to be her last night in DC before she took up her new post in the sunnier climes of San Diego. Cresswell's announcement had completely taken her by surprise, albeit a pleasant one, but his later announcement regarding Harm's promotion and subsequent posting to London left her shattered.

Being a good friend and loyal co-worker, she had congratulated him on his success and he reciprocated in kind. Mac thought the changes in circumstances would prompt him into action but even the 6000 miles that would be between them made no difference.

Harm had departed for London two days earlier with a simple hug and goodbye at the Roberts' house. Several times Mac sensed he wanted to say something but nothing eventuated. She resisted the urge to tell him there and then that she loved him. For some reason, inexplicable even to herself, Mac wanted Harm to make the first move.

She looked out at the reflecting pool and thought about all the dreams she had for herself. After a lifetime of hurt and disappointment she had only allowed herself to dream in recent years and in every one was Harm. He was always the one for her. Even when he annoyed her, which happened frequently, she wanted him.

Tears began to trickle, quiet tears of sadness and loneliness. She ignored them and looked towards The Wall. She remembered the times she had been there with Harm, how he always looked so beautiful yet so vulnerable in his uniform when standing in front of his father's name.

Closing her eyes for the umpteenth time, Mac chastised herself about her response in Paraguay. She had been so confused with everything and everyone that she had instinctively gone into self-preservation mode. Of all the regrets in her life, Mac believed Paraguay to be the biggest and the one from which she may never truly recover.

Opening her eyes, Mac reflections on lost chances did nothing but create more heartache. She stood, brushed down her jeans and turned for one last look at the Memorial. Taking a deep breath she turned and descended two steps before stopping abruptly.  
'Harm?' she said in barely a whisper.  
'Hi there, Mac.'  
He climbed several steps and stood one lower than her.  
'What are you doing here?'  
'There was something I forgot to do before I left.'  
'See your dad?' Mac asked as she nodded towards The Wall.  
'No, this!' Harm reached up and took Mac's face in his hands. She caught her breath as his soft hands caressed her face. Drawing her closer, Mac found herself lost in his crystal blue eyes, just as she had many years before. When their lips finally met, it was with a mixture of desire and relief.

When the realisation of what was happening struck, Mac pulled back, breaking their connection.  
'I don't understand,' she said.  
'Understand what?'  
'This!' She waved her hand around. 'I mean you left with barely a word and now, less than 48 hours later, you're back and...this! What happened? What changed?'

Harm took Mac's hand and sat down on the steps. Mac sat beside him.  
'What happened was this...' he said, looking out at the pool. 'I got to London and went to my new office. It's pretty swish with all sorts of gadgets to play with. There was my name on a gold plate on the door. The staff all called me 'sir' and the way they said it made me feel like a Lord or Duke. Anyhow….' he paused and inhaled deeply. 'Anyhow, I was welcomed and briefed by the acting captain, Carl Enquist, and I sat at my huge oak desk thinking that this was a wonderful career move. I had rank, responsibility, autonomy and things, Navy-wise, were great.'  
'So?'  
'So, when Enquist left, I opened my briefcase and the first thing I saw was our photo.'  
Mac smiled, she knew which one he meant.  
'I looked around and saw how well I had done in my career and I realised I didn't want my obituary to read Harmon Rabb Jnr had a glorious career. I want it to say he had a wonderful life.'  
Harm looked at Mac to gauge her response but she just nodded.  
'And,' he ventured bravely, 'I can only get that with you.'  
Mac nodded again.  
'So, I rang the SecNav, resigned, and now I'm here.'  
'You resigned?' Mac echoed incredulously.  
'Yep!'  
'What are you going to do?'  
Harm took a deep breath.  
'I am going to be in San Diego with you - if you'll have me, that is.'  
'Doing what? I mean you've resigned.'  
'I will hold you and kiss you, make love to you, cook, clean and generally be Mr Sarah MacKenzie, for the time being anyway. How does that sound?'  
Mac turned and gazed at him, words not coming.  
'Mac, I know you said never in Paraguay but...'  
Mac leant in and kissed him passionately - life looked so much better when it was bathed in the glory of love.


	3. Accidental Love

AN: Another oldie...Enjoy!

Harm had been out of the office for a few days interviewing witnesses for his latest case and had arrived back at JAG Headquarters tired and disheartened; having achieved very little to help his client. He walked in from the elevator and instantly scanned the bullpen to see if he could see Mac. It wasn't a deliberate action it was automatic, he had done it every time he walked in for as long as he cared to remember.

A broad smile spread over his face as he saw her walk from her office to the photocopier, it was a natural action to him as was breathing.

'Something amusing?' said General Cresswell appearing from nowhere.

'Ah, no sir,' Harm replied slightly embarrassed.

'Good. My office, Commander.'

'Yes, sir,' Harm said and obediently followed his commanding officer.

Mac turned to see Harm leaving with the General, she tried to get his attention but it was to no avail, she'd have to wait.

Harm stood to attention in front of the General's desk waiting to be told to sit but it didn't happen. The General sat and shuffled some papers. He took a sip of his coffee and then another one. He paged Coates and had her bring in some files. All the while Harm stood rigid in the middle of the room. When Jen brought the files in she didn't make eye contact with Harm and this heightened his growing anxiety that either something serious had happened or was about to.

After fifteen long minutes Harm spoke.

'Excuse me, General, I was wondering…'

'You were wondering why I asked you in here and then left you standing there?'

'Yes sir.'

'Annoying isn't it.'

'Yes sir, I mean no sir. I mean, what part is annoying?'

'Being left there, not having the answers, feeling something is beyond your control, knowing that it could all have been avoided.'

'Well, yes sir.'

'Now you know how I feel, Commander. I have had a week of being left there with things out of control, knowing it could have been avoided. I just wanted you to have the same experience.'

'General Cresswell, with all due respect, I have no idea what this is about.'

'You don't?'

'No sir. What did I or didn't I do to cause this … this situation?'

'Think hard, Commander.'

Harm stood trying to put together a plausible scenario and then it hit him. He flushed bright red and shut his eyes in an attempt to block out the reality, the General knew and his life as he knew it was over.

'Ah, I see you have figured it out, Commander.'

'Ah, yes, ah ….uh…sir.'

'So you tell me Commander, how did I go from being the CO of a group of JAG lawyers that were intelligent, hardworking, dedicated and 'like a family' to this?'

'What's 'this'?' asked Harm wanting to have the full details before he said something that would cause greater problems.

'This, Commander, is an office that is not functioning properly and we seem to have senior officers who can't seem to be in the same room without being embarrassed for no apparent reason. Now,

I've spoken to Roberts and MacKenzie and they both mumbled some incoherent response, both mentioned your name and both didn't want to be pushed on the subject. So Commander, I am asking you! You tell me, what is it that you did or didn't do to them?'

Harm flushed a colour of deep red the General had never seen before and muttered some response.

'I didn't catch that, Commander.'

Again Harm muttered his response.

'Commander!' the General yelled losing patience.

'I slept with one and not the other,' Harm replied loudly, surprising himself.

'You slept with …'

Harm cut him off. 'Not slept as in …well, as in sex but as in fell asleep on the couch and woke up in each others arms.'

'I see,' said the General, trying to conceal a smile at Harm's level of discomfort. 'And do you make it a habit of sleeping with your colleagues?'

'No sir,' Harm replied adamantly.

'Well, I can understand how that scene could be embarrassing, Commander, but something that I'm sure you and the Colonel could work through. What I don't understand is why not sleeping with one is problematic.'

'It wasn't the Colonel I slept with, slept on, slept…' Harm tried to find the right words for what had happened but each variation seemed to make matters worse.

'It was Commander Roberts?' The General asked incredulously, though in truth he already knew every detail.

'Yes sir,' Harm said drawing in a deep breath.

'And the Commander was upset by this?'

'Not as much as his wife was, sir.'

'Commander, sit and tell me how on earth this transpired.'

Harm sat and thought about the events which had occurred a week ago. He decided he would tell the General everything and deal with the consequences later.

**Flashback:**

Harriet had been feeling down about leaving JAG and being pregnant with twins and having two at home. She felt more of a baby factory than anything else and was having a miserable patch that Bud put down to hormones more than anything else. To make her feel better, Bud had taken to writing notes any time he thought about her and left them in a pile on his desk. He thought that at the end of the day he would take them all home and Harriet would see just how much he loved her and how he missed seeing her everyday at work and maybe it would cheer her up. Well, that was the plan.

Bud had just completed the final touches on the Emerson file and the Kandolis file for Mac and Harm respectively. He had added the notes they had both required and left them on their desks before heading out late on Tuesday night. Inadvertently he had switched files. On Wednesday morning Harm picked up the Emerson one from his desk and took it into Mac's office.

'Morning, Marine, I've been slaving away on your file all night and here it is,' he said jokingly.

'Morning, yourself, what a coincidence, I've been adding bits to your file too,' she laughed and handed over the Kandolis file. Harm left and Mac opened the folder, out fell a small piece of paper.

_S, I really miss you._

Mac read it several times but there was no real need, it was pretty clear. She flicked through the pages in the file and out fluttered a few more handwritten notes.

_S, I'd like to see you in that black negligee I know you have hidden for 'special' occasions._

_S, you are more beautiful everyday._

_S, ahhh, the things I'd like to be doing with you right now._

Mac blushed. She put all four out on the table in front of her. Her immediate thought was that it was Bud but he and Harm had nearly identical writing, _damn Naval Academy must teach handwriting._ She looked closer and noticed the flourish on the _S _, no, that's Harm's writing she convinced herself. Besides if either man was writing her love notes who would the most likely candidate be?

Meanwhile Harm had opened his own file.

_H, I hate not seeing you around the office _was written on a torn blue piece of paper and fell onto the desk. Harm picked it up noting the little love heart around the _H. _He dropped it back to the table. A quick shake of the file revealed two more notes.

_H, I'd love to massage your whole body tonight._

_H, you have a gorgeous smile, please show it more often._

Harm shuddered, there was no mistaking it, it was Bud's handwriting. He cringed. Could Bud really be having these thoughts about him? Bud, who loved his wife more than anything. Bud, who was the father of two with two more on the way. Bud, who, who, who was more like a brother to him than anyone else he had known. Quickly he gathered the notes as Mac came into his office without knocking.

'What's up Flyboy? You look like you've seen a ghost.'

'Uh, ah, nothing. What can I do for you?'

'I just came to say 'thanks' again for the file.'

' 'Twas nothing really,' which was the truth.

'What are you doing for dinner?'

'What did you have in mind, Marine?'

'Nothing specific at this moment, I just thought you could come over and…'

'Hi there, sir, ma'am,' Bud interrupted. Harm shivered involuntarily as chills ran down his spine but the others remained oblivious to this.

'Bud, how are you?' Mac asked.

'Fine thanks, ma'am, and you?'

'I'm doing really well,' she said throwing a big smile at Harm that confused him.

'And sir, how are you?'

'Fine, Bud. How can we help you?' Harm said uncomfortably.

'It's you I want sir,' replied Bud and Harm nearly died in his chair.

'Well, I'll leave you two to it,' Mac winked at Harm as she left. This made Harm all the more uncomfortable, did Mac know Bud had feelings for him.

'What is it, Bud?'

'The General wants us to complete the Budget and Acquisition paperwork by 0700 tomorrow. So, I hope you don't have any plans because it'll just be me and you tonight.'

'Why me? I mean, I did it last year. Can't you and Mac or Sturgis do it?'

'The General specifically said you and I. Do you have a problem with that?'

'No, Bud, no problem. I guess we can put in the hours here tonight.'

'Not here sir. There is maintenance work scheduled and we wouldn't get any peace. My place is out because I'm sure Harriet would interrupt so how about your place.'

'Ah, I suppose.'

'Alright, let's say 1900 your place. I'll bring pizza and it's a date. Well, not date but you know what I mean.' Bud left.

Harm shook his head, what had just happened. Did he just make a dinner date with Bud? Was there work or was it an excuse? He didn't know what to think.

Later that afternoon.

'So Harm, about dinner?' Mac asked, cornering him in the break room.

'Oh yeah, about that. Change of plans, I'm having dinner with Bud…'

'Oh, what's Bud got that I haven't?' she said pouting. Mac had planned an evening around that negligee he had mentioned.

'It's not like … it's not…the General has us doing Budget and Acquisition stuff. Needs to be done by 0700 and we'll be working late.'

'Well, how about I come over to your place later and see if I can_ help_ you.'

Harm's first response was to say yes, with people around Bud wouldn't say or do anything that might be inappropriate but then he reconsidered. Having Mac, the woman of his desires and who was giving him some pretty clear signals today, in the same room as a man that was expressing similar sentiments might all be too much.

'Look, can I say no for tonight. It's just Bud and I…' _God, now I've made us sound like a couple _he thought. 'We've got to get this done. How about a raincheck?'

'Alright, but I can't believe you are standing me up for a night with Bud,' Mac laughed. She knew work came first but she enjoyed having fun at Harm's expense, he was taking it all so seriously.

Harm and Bud had eaten the pizza and then worked silently and diligently to wade through the reams of paper work that needed completing. There was little of the personal relationship the two had enjoyed for so long. Harm made no mention of Harriet or the kids which Bud thought unusual but then Harm had not been himself today so Bud let it slide. With the end in sight, Bud decided they needed a little break.

'Do you mind if I get a coffee, Harm?' Bud asked getting up from the couch.

'Certainly not, I should have offered. I guess I got caught up in trying to finish this lot,' replied Harm, aware that Bud had used his first name, something he rarely did.

'Can I get you one?'

'No, thanks, I'll stick to the water.'

Bud poured himself a cup and returned to the couch.

'Harm, can we talk a minute?' Bud asked fiddling nervously with his cup.

_Oh good God, _Harm thought to himself, _this is it. Oh God, what will I say?_

'Sure, Bud,' Harm managed between heart palpitations.

'Is there something wrong? You seem so preoccupied and distant today.'

'No, Bud,' Harm lied, if Bud didn't mention the notes he wouldn't either.

'It's just sometimes it's good to talk things through.'

'Yeah, I know, but really it's just been a busy day and I think I may be coming down with the flu,' he lied again.

'So there's nothing you want to share with me?' Bud asked again.

'Like what?'

'I don't know your love life?' Bud ventured bravely, he had seen Mac around him today, and he knew there was something happening. He and Harriet had hoped for so long this pair would get together; perhaps it was really going to happen.

'No, Bud, nothing new on the love life front.' Harm wanted to add _why do you want to know _but he decided he didn't want to hear the answer.

They both went back to work and after another period of silence Bud looked over to find Harm with his head back on the couch, eyes closed and sleeping.

He completed the remaining tasks and refiled everything, ready for presentation to the General in the morning. When the last job was done, he too leant back and drifted off to an immediate and demanding sleep. After all it was 0345.

Next Morning

Knowing the volume of work Bud and Harm had to get through, Mac decided that her charitable act that morning would be to bring plenty of hot coffee and pastries to Harm's apartment, in case they had not yet finished. Aware of the 0700 deadline, she pulled up in front of his building at 0520 and saw Bud's car still there and the lights still burning in the apartment. _Poor babies _she thought to herself.

At first she knocked quietly but got no response so she knocked louder. When that failed to have the door opened she turned the handle and opened it herself.

'Good mor….' She began but the sight in front of her stopped her mid sentence. Both men were slumped in the corner of the couch, wrapped in each others arms, sound asleep. Except for being envious, Mac thought it was one of the funniest things she had ever seen. And like a true friend she knew what she should do. She walked back out into the hallway and called Harriet. She apologised for the timing of the call but insisted Harriet come straight over, which she could do thanks to Mikey staying the night. She waited in the hallway for her friend to arrive.

When Harriet opened the door she had to quickly shut it again to stop waking them up with her laughter. She wanted to get her own enjoyment out of this by playing the poor wife. She took several deep breaths and then flung the door open.

'Ahem,' she coughed loudly. 'What is the meaning of this?'

Both men opened their eyes and realised the position they were in. They jumped up and saw Harriet and Mac standing there arms folded, looking very upset.

'I can't believe I thought you were working and you were here, asleep with him. This is every wife's worst nightmare – finding her husband in the arms of another…another man.' Harriet turned her back so they wouldn't see her smile.

'I can't believe you'd rather sleep with Bud than me, I'm…I'm...I don't know what I am.' Mac put a 'comforting' arm around Harriet and walked her out the door. When they were safe in the lift they burst into laughter. Both men had been left speechless.

Present Time

'That's a fine mess, Commander.'

'Well, sir I would have liked to straighten things out but as soon as I got in you sent me out on assignment and I've only just arrived back and …'

'Enough, Commander,' the General paged Coates and ordered Mac and Bud to his office.

When they had arrived the General looked from one to another.

'Now, in terms this CO can understand, what's gotten into you three?'

'It's my fault,' said Bud lowering his head.

'All this is your fault, Commander, how so?'

'I wrote the notes.'

'What notes?' Harm hadn't mentioned the notes.

'Well, I was writing Harriet notes at work about different things and they inadvertently got mixed in with case notes and I think the Commander and the Colonel might have gotten the wrong idea.'

Mac and Harm spun around to look at Bud.

'You wrote them?' they said in unison.

'Yes I did.'

'You got notes?' Harm asked Mac. 'You thought they were from me?'

'Yeah and you thought yours were from Bud?' she asked in response.

Both nodded.

'Well that cleared a few things up,' said the General. 'Commander Roberts wrote the notes to his wife, Commander Rabb thought that Commander Roberts was in love with him and Colonel MacKenzie thought Commander Rabb was in love with her. Nice little triangle we have here. For three seemingly clever people you'd think one of you would speak up and ask the other about the notes. All this could have been avoided. It's a good thing Lieutenant Sims was on the ball.'

'Harriet!' they chorused in unison.

'Yes, Harriet,' replied the General. 'She figured it out days ago and when she came in yesterday to sort out some administrative foul up she told me about it.'

'Just came out and told you, sir?' asked Mac.

'No, I asked a few questions and she gave the answers.'

'Well, how did she figure it out?' asked Bud bewildered that his wife may have thought that he sent love notes to Harm or to Mac or both.

The General pressed his intercom buzzer twice and in walked Harriet.

She smiled at the General and at her perplexed friends.

'Lieutenant, care to enlighten our dazzling investigative colleagues.'

'Yes, sir. Well, last Tuesday night Bud came home and handed me a pile of notes. He said that he loved me and that these notes would tell me how much. I was really touched and wanted to read them but Jimmy had thrown up everywhere, AJ had split his drink and I was feeling the effects of a twin pregnancy. I put them in my pocket to read later and forgot about them, sorry, Bud. When I finally got around to reading them on the weekend I was surprised to say the least. They were case notes regarding Corporal Emerson and Ensign Kandolis. I couldn't figure out what they meant but when Bud told me how strange and strained things were in the office, particularly after the Thursday morning's sleeping arrangements...' Both men blushed. 'I put two and two together. Notes meant for me went to you guys and you know the rest.'

'Well, well,' stammered Harm, 'that explains the mix up with the H notes but what about the S ones?'

'Oh,' said Bud. 'S was for Sweetie.'

Mac was the first to burst into laughter she couldn't believe a simple misunderstanding had led to this. The men, still being more embarrassed than amused took a few moments to take on board the news. It had all been a mistake, there were no underlying feelings between the two, sleeping together had been a coincidence, everything was as it was before.

'Well, if I could just ask that my senior officers stop loving, sleeping with or doing otherwise with each other so we can get some work done, I would be more than grateful.'

'Aye, sir,' said the three standing at attention. They paused and turned to leave. They heard the General's parting remark but none chose to acknowledge it.

'For future reference, if you have to _love _your colleagues, don't bring it into the office. I won't ask and you won't tell.' He smiled at himself and winked at Harriet.

In the safety of Coates' office the three looked sheepishly at each other, embarrassed that after years of friendship they couldn't ask each other the questions they had needed to. Bud decided to push matters a little further.

'If I may, sir, ma'am, in this little accidental love triangle of ours where I apparently loved you, sir, and, ma'am, you thought he loved you. Who loved me?'

'I did,' said Harriet from behind. 'I have always loved you, Bud, even if you did sleep with the Commander.'

'Uh Harriet, you know that we…'

'Yes, dear, I was just kidding.' Harriet took Mac's arm and they walked out through the bullpen, enjoying the humour of the moment.

'God, I love her,' said Bud.

'Me too!' said Harm.

Bud looked at him strangely. 'No, Bud, no' Harm corrected, 'I mean I love Harriet as a friend, you two are family but I …What I mean is …'

'It's okay sir,' Bud laughed. 'I knew you meant the Colonel, I was just checking. One accidental love triangle a week is enough for me. Go get her, sir, do something about it.'

Bud walked away leaving Harm in a state of shock.

In the confusion of who loved who he had just admitted to Bud that he loved Sarah MacKenzie and he had no idea what to do next.


End file.
